The FCC to the Rescue
Over the past few years, the FCC, the Folly Communications Commission, has been the vanguard of the righteous in our country. It has protected us against vile nudity and naughty words on television and radio. Nudity is an affront to G-d, even if we were created in His image. And naughty words are . . . naughty.
Unfortunately, the evil purveyors of filth are now able to bypass this heroic organization by broadcasting their smut on cable television and satellite radio, over which the FCC has no jurisdiction. We cannot allow this. We cannot allow anyone to see or hear anything that isn't moral and wholesome.
We must extend the FCC's jurisdiction to these media.
And beyond.
Instead of just monitoring broadcasts, the FCC should also monitor individual homes, to make certain there is no nudity and no naughty words spoken. So the good people of this country can sleep easy at night knowing all their countrymen are just like them.
Unfortunately, the evil purveyors of filth are now able to bypass this heroic organization by broadcasting their smut on cable television and satellite radio, over which the FCC has no jurisdiction. We cannot allow this. We cannot allow anyone to see or hear anything that isn't moral and wholesome.
We must extend the FCC's jurisdiction to these media.
And beyond.
Instead of just monitoring broadcasts, the FCC should also monitor individual homes, to make certain there is no nudity and no naughty words spoken. So the good people of this country can sleep easy at night knowing all their countrymen are just like them.
posted by Colin Cohen at 19.11.04
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